Cliff-Hanger

Grasshopper eating an egg at the Hawks' Halloween Picnic
It was a lovely week, though a bit on the cool side. It began with the 18 miler last Sunday, and concluded with a 10 mile run yesterday. In between the two bookends, I managed a relatively paltry 9 miles. Still, though, the combo worked well. Only one day came and went where my legs just didn't feel quite up to task.

This past year I have kept myself motivated by trying to have no motivators other than my own will to improve. I have entered no races and trained for no specific event. I did do a fun run, Colleen's Sweaty Ass Run, in the Summer, but there was no fee, no race, no set distance; thus the only reward was internal and transitory.

With my knee surgery approaching, and with knee pain rearing up a bit on the longer runs, I thought it actually might be a good idea to knock out a 50K - an official 50K - as in I pay my fee, show up at an appointed hour and run the dang thing. And I had picked just the perfect race, the Blue Springs 50/50 coming up next weekend. I had a friend, my running buddy, Eric, who agreed to come along and pace if I needed it, and drive the car home. The course is soft, flat, and easy... But then, after a chat with a fellow Trail Hawk (who shall remain nameless), I have rethought my objectives. His comments dealt with the strain of any long run. I had been operating on the notion that my knee was already a mess, and that, since it couldn't get any worse, why not knock out a final pre-surgery long run? But after our conversation, I started to think the better of it. I guess I am grappling less with the physical side (I am fairly confident that everything will hold up), and much more with the spiritual side (I have really enjoyed running with no pressure, and even contemplating issues surrounding this fairly simple run, seem to intrude on the soulfulness of the long run).

I'm actually torn. I suppose next week's posting will let you know whether or not I ran the race. Wow, I rarely leave this post with a cliff-hanger:-)